ASTI Constitution!

I found a wonderful tactic to resolve being a bully towards another, in a peaceful way on: Melissa Ma's Blog:

I believe that people bully others so they can feel better about themselves. Knowing that you can control another person's emotions makes you feel important to others. It was hard to stop being mean to the girl when I knew that all of my other friends were doing the same. Then I realized, that instead of following the crowd, I should speak up for the girl. The next day instead of leaving her I stayed with her, and it turns out that she was actually very nice.

While reading Melissa's blog, I learned  people can change from what they seem or believe is/was wrong. She showed bravery, strenght, and perserverance when she stood up for the girl who was getting bullied. I felt like she went out of her comfortable zone to make another person feel safe and respected. Also, in the end of Melissa's blog above, shows that she was just bulling a girl because other people were bulling her, it shows that Melissa was trying to have control and seem more popular (or maybe not). But either way, she stood out more like an  individual rather than a group or clique; standing up for her and having a conversation with her, which maybe, made the girl being bullied, more comfortable and happy. Good Job Melissa!

This quote also relates to a many of the ASTI Constitution, such as: Include, do not exclude; speak up for your self and others; take responsibility for your actions; make a positive impact on the people and environment around you, and resolve conflict peacefully. All of these rules, show how easy it is to make a person(s) feel equal and to always have people(s) back even though you may not know then.

Just Kidding’ and ‘Ganging up’ from Odd Girl Out By Rachael Simmons

Thinking back, I notice that I was not really apart of an alliance where they have or had bullied, harassed, or made someone feel bad. But, I have been made fun of from a single and larger group of people, this made me feel disrespect, putdown, and uncomfortable. The incident was, I was at school and it was the second week of school, I was wearing my scarf and people were staring at me in a way that made me feel awkward and that I had that I had something wrong with me. In the beginning, I never knew what was wrong, but all of a sudden a student came towards me and asked “ why are you wearing a scarf?” and before I was able to respond the student said, “ Oh I know it is because you have ugly hair and embarrassed to show it off!” students laughed and people started to confront me and say “Stupid Muzlums”. And because it was my first year at this school, I ran to the restroom and started to cry. I felt that whom I am was not common or right. It seemed that every time I went to school, everyone was not looking at me but only the scarf, it was not my personality that impressed them, and it was how I looked. I did not talk to anyone for the past two months and during lunch I ran quickly to the library so know one would see me. I felt I was playing hide-in-go-seek.

            My options in this situation were to put everything to where it was on the first day of school. I was trying not to get in anyone’s way, smiling to people who I did not like, letting people boss me around. When I see the face of the person who made the rude, racial comment to me, I would try to find another route to get to my destination or stand somewhere and cover myself. I did not have another choice. I knew telling the teacher or principal would be the right thing, but seeing other situations where students told on other classmates, showed me it was not the right thing to do. I just had to let it go.

            I assume the reason why people bully others is to get their way, have more friends, and to show students that they are the, “ Big and Bad people around campus”. They do this so they can “slide” through any conflicts or situations the student was blamed about. It also shows the bullies that  they have a better chances not getting caught doing illegal or dangerous actions. They feel they have power. I say this because in my situation I was so afraid of that student more than my teacher or principal; I was bad.

            The main component that makes bullies hurt their peers is their family conflicts or background about the person. Maybe a while back, they were called a  “loser” and bullied around or maybe they family problems and cannot express their anger on the situation, so they take it out in school. It makes them feel better. There are a may reasons why a student may bully other student; they just do not know another way to deal with them.

As a result, bullying is not a person’s real personality.